Saturday, February 27, 2010

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Recently, I have been teaching teens and young adults how to be assertive and manage conflict in their lives.

As I am repeating the lessons, I am also reminding myself to use clear and direct communication with others.

For years, I didn’t do this. I found more comfort using a passive aggressive route, which meant if I wasn’t getting my needs or wants met, I’d find more manipulative ways to do so. Or even worse, I wouldn’t tell anyone and wouldn’t make any attempt—manipulative or not—to get my needs or wants met.

Now, when I realize it’s time to voice something, I find it much easier to do. I’m sure being older and more experienced helps.

As I told the over thirty students I visited with this past week: “Don’t wait to become assertive. Don’t wait to start communicating in a clear and direct manner. Start now. Take small steps. Begin now to build your assertiveness muscle.”

Tell the young people in your life this message. It will save them lots of heartache and pain.

1 comment:

Carolyn Howard-Johnson said...

Sometimes, Allyn, you seem to recount my younger days. And it's always a good review! Keeps me on track!